By Jasmine Vance
April 15, 2012
God has had me on an amazing journey since 2008. But the real pivotal point came in the spring of 2010. It’s a faith walk like I’ve never seen before. He was preparing the way for me. I had an idea of what I wanted my life to look like, but God had other plans. I had just graduated the semester before from college. I was home again, not quite sure of what the next steps would entail.
My family told me I needed to go out there and go find a job. The problem was…I was either over qualified or I needed to go back to school for a Maters’ degree. So I even applied for jobs out of desperation; doing things I could never see myself doing at one time. I had let others define for me what my life should be. . My family couldn’t understand why I wasn’t getting hired anywhere. They were convinced that I was doing something wrong. I had applied to be a mental health worker, unit secretary, banking jobs, retail, social services, and at a mortgage firm to become a loan processor. But none of them hired me.
The problem was I needed something that would allow me to go to school and work at the same time. That became a hard thing to try to accommodate. I had to make a hard (and I mean hard) decision to turn down a job that would have set me up financially and made me financially secure. I wouldn’t even have to worry about how to pay back my student loans! But, in accepting that position, I couldn’t go to school and work there. Most importantly… God had already told me no.
I did not know how to break that news to my parents. Money was supposed to make you ‘secure’, according to the world. But what happens when you no longer have the money? Your safety blanket gets ripped away. My father did not understand that me obeying God, meant that at the time I would be turning down a job, and going back to school.
Right after I interviewed for the job at a mortgage firm, I attended the Women in Covenant Women’s Conference. I had no idea the kind of life transforming power that the conference would have on my life! I saw it as a much needed vacation, and God used it to renew me spiritually. The theme of that conference was, “Breakthrough”. That was something I felt that I needed desperately.
Amazingly, a woman who I never saw before approached me during the conference. These are some of the words she shared with me:
“Read Psalm 23 for understanding in how it applies to your life; and God’s plan for your life. Enjoy the process, the moments along the way to your Destiny. Make sure you live your life so that your cup keeps overflowing. We see the picture but there is a process. Allow God to bring you through that process. He has great things planned for your life. You will be a blessing and an inspiration to others. Your example will help others. Your light/spirit is shining so that we, others can see God in you. I can see that you love the Lord greatly. Don’t allow this time in your life pass you by. Don’t miss your visitation, says it the Lord (you know what the bigger picture is). Enjoy the moments that the Lord our God gives to you.”
It was at that moment that I realized that God was there with me all along! I knew when I went home I had to turn down that job. I had come there as a young woman unsure of herself,and I left with a new found confidence in the Lord. I was now willing to walk that walk of faith. I wasn’t sure what kind of curve balls life was going to throw out at me…but whatever it was, I was ready to serve the Lord wholeheartedly!!
In March of that year, I went back to a job I said that I would never go back to. Unfortunately, they were the only ones offering employment to me at the time, so I took it. That was the most miserable 9 months of my life. Yes 9 months of labor pains. But in those nine months, He was molding my heart, in His image. The place I was working at was painful and uncomfortable so I wouldn’t want to stay when it was time to leave. When God says “Move”, you move, no questions asked! Just leave all of the consequences to Him.
God wanted me to be completely dependent on Him. He alone wanted to fulfill all of my needs. The only way He could get me there was to completely strip me down to bare essentials. That was a hard year financially. I couldn’t afford my maintenance medications for asthma, I wasn’t able to save any money, nor could I afford gas money to even get to my part time job. At the end of the year I knew I would be without a job because of school. My bank account would have been completely empty by December.
I had no clue where He was taking me, but I had to take that chance and step out on faith. He sustained my health so I didn’t need the medications. He showed up right on time for me. But that meant that I had to do as He told me; even when I didn’t want to, or I didn’t quite understand why I was told to do certain things. I did it anyway, and He provided me with a new job in a much better working environment, and I made more than double of what the previous job was paying! God is so good!!
It has taken me a year and a half to understand what the stranger at the conference meant by ‘enjoy the process’. This just shows you how God works on His timing… not yours. You can’t rush God. I would not hear those words again until I began my counseling training. Then things began to make sense. If I had not stopped to listen to God’s still small voice, and pray and inquire about what it was He wanted me to do, I would not be here right now writing for B.L.O.G. Magazine!
I don’t want to even imagine where I would be right now if I had ignored, or chose not to heed God’s calling on my life. Good thing I never have to find out .
B.L.O.G. Magazine Contributing Writer
Jasmine is a graduate student at Philadelphia Biblical University where she is studying for her Masters of Science in Christian Counseling degree. She is currently working for Mall Ministries, Inc. DBA Burlington Center Mall Ministry as a church and volunteer coordinator. She also mentors at risk pre-teens and teen girls. She is also involved in her church, Abundant Life Fellowship, as a youth leader. You can find her on Facebook at Jasmine Vance